State Representative Betty Brown is in hiding tonight from thousands of genealogists who are camped outside her home, demanding to know her REAL last name. "It's quite possible that we should be calling this state representative Betty Braunstein, Betty Brunelleschi or Betty De Bruijne," said one leading onomatologist.
These experts are insistent that in nearly every single case, the name Brown has been anglicized from one of the following names:
English: generally a nickname, Middle English (le) brun, from Old English brun or Old French brun (both of Germanic origin; cf. Old High German brun), referring to the colour of the hair, complexion, or clothing. It may occasionally be from a personal name, Old English Brun or Old Norse Brúni, with the same origin. Brun- was also a Germanic name-forming element; some instances of Old English Brun may therefore be short forms of compound names such as Brungar, Brunwine, etc. The German cognates are associated with the much more common Continental personal name Bruno, which was borne by the Dukes of Saxony, among others, from the 10th century or before. It was also the name of several medieval German and Italian saints, including the founder of the Carthusian order (1030 - 1101), who was born in Cologne. Brown also occurs as an anglicization of the Jewish names listed below, including compounds, and of names in other languages meaning brown.
Variants: Broun, Broune, Browne
Augmentative: Italian: Brunone.
Cognates: Catalan: Bru, Brun; Bruna (feminine). Danish, Norwegian, Swedish: Bruhn, Brunn, Bruun. Dutch: Bruin, Bruine, Bruyn, Bruyne, De Bruin, De Bruine, De Bruijn, De Bruijne. Flemish: Bruinen, Bruineman, De Bruyn, De Bruyne; Bryn. French: Lebrun. German: Braun. Low German: Bruhn, Brun. Italian: Bruni, Bruno. Jewish (Ashkenazic): Braun; Brauner; Broinlich (from Yiddish broynlekh brownish). Portuguese: Bruno.
Compounds (ornamental): Jewish: Braunfeld brown field, anglicized as Brownfield; Braunroth brownish red; Braunstein brown stone, anglicized as Brownstein; Braunthal brown valley.
Diminutives: Catalan: Brunet. English: Brownett, Brunet, Burnell, Burnet, Burnett. French: Brugnot (Switzerland); Bruneau, Brunel, Brunet, Bruneton, Bruno, Brunt. Frisian: Bruinsma. German: Bräunle, Bräunlein, Breinl, Breinlein; Praundl, Praundlin (Bayern). Italian: Brunelli, Brunetti, Brunini, Brunotti. Low German: Bruhnke, Brunke, Brühnicke, Brünicke; Brüntje.
Patronymics: Dutch: Bruns. English: Bronson. French: Aubrun. Flemish: Bruyns, Bryns. Frisian: Bruins. German: Brauns:. Low German: Bruhns:, Bruhnsen, Bruns:, Brunsen. Rumanian: Brunesco.
Patronymics (from diminutives): Low German: Brüntjen. Dutch: Bruyntjes. Italian: Brunelleschi.
Brown is one of the most common surnames in the English-speaking world, with, for example, some 5000 listings in the London Telephone Directory and over 2500 in Manhattan. The variant Browne is also common in all parts of Britain and Ireland; in Galway it is borne by descendants of a 12th-century Norman invader called le Brun, and has in part been gaelicized as de Brún.
In a joint press conference today, thousands of Caucasian groups from around the country stated, "It is certainly our hope that Betty Brown will come clean and reveal the secret she has been hiding for years, that her real last name is virtually impossible to spell or pronounce. Her nameophobia had got to stop. She's just corrupting the voting process in Texas, knowing full well that if her true last name is known, no poll worker in the state will be able to find her name on the list of eligible voters."