Dan Patrick And Warren Chisum: I Now Pronounce You Husband And Wife

Arghhhhhhhhhhhh! That sound you hear is me reacting to the latest attempt this legislative session to "save marriages." Senator Dan Patrick introduced a bill to increase the wait time before a divorce is finalized from 60 days to 180 days. First, a little lesson in dissolving the legal contract called "marriage." It rarely takes just 60 days to "get her done" because one party or the other (oh, and what a party divorce is! party on!) will be an ass (the man) and cause all sorts of mayhem and make the damn thing drag on and on and on and on. This is called "paying for your attorney's luxury cruise in the Mediterranean." For her and her extended family. Second, the 6-month wait time is plenty of time to do bodily harm to your spouse. Because you are so sick and tired of the whole thing and who are you going to blame? Dan Patrick? No, your spouse who makes you crazy. Now you are talking sending your attorney around the world for a whole year. First class air; first class hotels. Fine dining. Oh, and more jails. Third, Patrick has an exception where if you get 10 hours of counseling, you can decrease the 180 days to 90 days. How does this save a marriage if the logic is to make the couple wait and wait and wait and then long to get back together and live miserably ever after? I'm thinking Dan and Warren should hook up. After all, I divorced Rep. Warren Chisum on the grounds of irreconcilable IQ differences, but I think he's found his soul mate in Sen. Patrick.