Uh-Oh, I Think The Washington Post Is Making Fun Of Shelley!

Oh, my. It didn't take long for the Post to catch on that they have the silliest Congresswoman ever in their midst for just a few short weeks and they better start in on her quick. They followed her around on Monday, her swearing-in day, and they caught her doing and saying the goofiest things. I think they tried to make this a serious news piece, but it kind of degenerates into SNL. Read the whole thing, but here are some of the best parts. My comments are in pink. WP in bold. It will be hard to tell as it goes on because the Post writer starts to sound like muse. :)

"I'm working hard to accomplish the things I'm working for," she said yesterday. "For tax cuts. For immigration reform. To make sure we have a good solution for the war in Iraq."

All that? In a few weeks? (Someone tell Shelley to get over herself. She won't "solve" the war in Iraq, nor will she teach W how to speak English in six weeks. Botox the entire Congressional delegation? Perhaps.)

"If there's a way to do it, I'll do it," she said, smiling beneath her bright blond hair. "I'll deal with the leadership to get as much done as possible."

On Monday evening, just before she took the oath of office, Sekula-Gibbs held her first congressional news conference in her new office, which is DeLay's old office. Wearing a blue pantsuit with a fuchsia blouse and a string of pearls, she quickly proved that she has mastered the art of the well-worn political bromide.

She said: "I'm proud that the people of the 22nd Congressional District honored me with their votes."

She said: "I'm blessed by God. This really is a gift from God."

She said: "I'm looking forward to rolling up my (pink) sleeves and getting as much done as I can accomplish."

(OK, I made up the pink sleeves part, but still, we have photo evidence of the pink swearing-in outfit!)

. . . after being sworn in, she addressed her distinguished colleagues: "I look forward to getting to know each of you and working on the initiatives that will help strengthen our country."

Getting to know all 434 of them? That's a lot to do in a few weeks. (But, they will want to know her! And, she has danishes in her office!)

In the next hour, Sekula-Gibbs cast three votes. The first was on a bill to "suspend the rules and agree to the Senate amendment" to something called the Trail of Tears Study Act. She stuck her brand-new voting card into a machine and voted yes. Then she looked up at the big screen behind the House speaker's desk and saw a little green light appear next to her name. (damn! not pink! someone make it pink!)

It was a courageous vote for Sekula-Gibbbs. If she ever runs for office again, that vote could inspire a vicious attack ad. It's not hard to imagine it: The worst photo ever taken of Sekula-Gibbs appears on the TV screen and an ominous voice says, " She voted to suspend the rules of Congress . . . " (Don't put this past the DCCC . . . )

When the voting ended, Sekula-Gibbs rose to make the first official motion of her congressional career: "Mr. Speaker," she said, "I move that the House now adjourn." (Houston City Council members, does sound familiar? Shelley wanting attention?)

The motion carried, and she stepped out into the Speaker's Lobby, where reporters were poised to ask her how it felt. (Asking, "was it good for you?")

"It was very exciting," she said.

How did she feel, asked a reporter from the Houston Chronicle, when Democrats came over to greet her? (Did any of their skin problems gross you out?)

"I welcome that," she said. "I welcome bipartisan support."

Amazing! In one short night in Congress, Sekula-Gibbs had already done most of the things that our elected representatives do. She'd held a news conference, she'd voted, she'd endorsed bipartisanship, and she'd pledged to "work with my colleagues." To experience the full gamut of congressional life, about all she needed now was a committee meeting and a breakfast meeting.

Alas, she hadn't been assigned to any committees yet. But yesterday she did hold a breakfast meeting in her office for constituents. Her staff provided Danish pastries and a Dunkin' Donuts Box o' Joe.

By then, she'd been in office for 15 hours. A reporter asked, "Have you been corrupted by power yet?"

"No, I haven't," she said. And she burst out laughing. (No, but my staff has walked out on me, so I've already pissed off the little people. Does that count?)

But only for a moment. A second later, she was serious again. "It's been a rewarding experience," she said, "and I'm looking forward to making a difference and providing a solid voice for conservative values."

I hardly know what to say except that Washington is really getting to know the true Shelley. I mean, this really is her. Full of herself and over reaching. Has she resigned her City Council seat? Probably not. She most likely thinks she can "solve the Iraq war" while at the same time claiming to solve all the City's problems (you know, the ones she makes up) back home. We are three days into this lame duck session with Shelley and so far it has been non-stop entertainment. For us and our friends inside the Beltway.